Lobster Requiem

(photo: Marite Irimia,
courtesy of Richard Drexler's
Lobster Dance Music)

After the hate mail I've received lately from militant vegans in response to my article in Boston magazine about cooking lobsters, this e-mail from a gentleman named Paul was refreshing:

From reading your Lobster FAQ's, I have learnt that when lobsters "squeal" in boiling water, the high-pitched noise is actually the steam escaping from its body cavities. I have thought of an idea. Would different sized lobsters produce different tonations of "squeal"? If so, it may be possible to create a "lobster piano" in which lobsters of different size are released into the hot water with such timing that a tune would be played. Has one of these ever been made?

God bless you, Paul, you made my day. I don't know, but I sure as heck hope you make one and send us the recording.